


Incident Report: Mars is a Total Douchebag

by perscuro



Category: Nate Sagittarius
Genre: Original Character(s), Original Fiction, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-20
Updated: 2019-04-20
Packaged: 2020-01-22 22:42:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18536947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/perscuro/pseuds/perscuro
Summary: Mars Huygens loses his wedding ring, and tries to figure out a plan to find it again without his wife Venus finding out. He ultimately makes a mess, and drags everyone down with him.





	Incident Report: Mars is a Total Douchebag

**Author's Note:**

> This is a fan-fiction written about original characters of my friend Gianna ( @lamehaikus on Instagram ). None of the events that occur in this fan fiction reflect an actual event that will happen in her canon series. This was made of my own creative liberties, while still attempting to keep her characters in character with the situation I've thrown them in.

In all fairness, I originally didn’t want to help Mars, however, hypothetically if a panicking cyclops offered you a shiny gold arm guard that you may have been begging to have for a few months… What would you do? (To be fair, he doesn't use it. At all.) I suppose the questions now are: Did I accept his bribe? Yes. Should I have believed his bribe? Probably not, but the point of this isn’t to criticize me, so please don’t criticize me. I just really wanted that arm guard.

Alright, admittedly I probably shouldn’t have accepted (or believed) his offer but… I could hope, right? I know… I know, it was a poor decision on my side, but I already agreed to help him out, so I couldn’t have backed out of it even if I wanted to.

Either way, whether I’d accepted or not, there was still an angry, red-headed cyclops hanging over my bed waking me up from my assumably pleasant dream, and I was confused, still sleepy, and my brain was half functioning at that point, so please… Don’t judge me too hard. I figure that I should prematurely mention that, yes, part of the agreement was to absolutely not tell Venus what was going on no matter the situation, or, as he insisted, he would break my femur.

The positive notation of this situation would be that I was used to being pushed around by Mars, and that I always wear pajamas to bed. The negative part of this situation is that I, a sleeping teenage boy, was an unsuspecting victim to Mars’ typical antics, and I was hanging upside-down. As someone who had a tendency to drool while they slept, it was an unpleasant experience to wake up, panicking, with your own drool streaming into your nose.

I know. Gross. However, I would like to point out that my own drool wouldn’t have had any sort of affect on you if it wasn’t for Mars, so if you were to point a finger of disgust at anyone in this scenario, point it at Mars, not me.

Another negative to this situation is that, as any normally functioning person would do, I freaked out when I woke up outside my bed, upside down, with a cyclops’ hairy legs directly in my eyesight as my ankles were being gripped by what felt like sandpaper. (I obviously realized in a few seconds that what originally was assumed to be sandpaper was in fact Mars’ hands. In all fairness, they are calloused.) Either way, whether it was sandpaper or Mars’ hands, there was still a loud voice screaming my name, and I was upside down… Put emphasis on was upside down.

Waking up in that sort of condition would typically make you flail around like a fish out of water, which would result with the perpetrator dropping you, and your cranium smashing against the floor. So, in conclusion, I was woken up very suddenly, I drooled in my own nose, I was dropped on my head, and I had a cyclops yelling in my room… Did I forgot anything? Oh, right… I didn’t know it yet, but it was also four in the morning.

I had a feeling that in my dazed moment of head pain and drowsiness I said something real smart to Mars. I probably said something really intelligent, like, “Uhh… What are you doing in my room?”

I honestly regret asking. It would have been so much easier if I had just called Venus the moment I saw Mars in my room. He enjoyed bringing frustration into others lives, and Venus would have been able to fix this whole situation before it even started.

You see, Venus was the CEO of The Venus Villas (I know, who would have guessed?), which would make her my boss, and someone who could have gotten this entire situation under control. Venus is a vampire who looked like what I would imagine the result of photoshopping Marilyn Monroe and Audrey Hepburn together would look like… If you ignored the fact that she was really tall, had pointed ears, and red eyes, I think it’s a good comparison. I almost forgot to mention, she’s also Mars’ wife.

“Do you remember how Venus and I are married?”

“How could I forget, Mars, but how does this explain you barging into my room?”

He held up the necklace that he keeps his wedding rings on, “I lost her ring.”

I looked at the chain he held up from around his neck, and it did, in fact, only hold one ring. Mercury’s ring, “Are you sure that’s not Venus’ ring and you didn’t lose Mercury’s?” I asked because Mercury would be much more forgiving.

He explained that he knew that ring was Mercury’s because Venus wanted Mars to have a flashy ring to show their marriage, and Mercury had just wanted a simple wedding band as their display, and the ring he had on his necklace was a plain silver wedding ring.

“Nate, you need to help me.”

“I don’t need to do anything. Why don’t you go to Mercury and ask him to make you a duplicate? Why would you come to me about your marriage problems?”

“‘Cause Mercury would tell Venus because he’s the trustiest husband of this relationship! And you’re an elf, so that makes you smart, or something.”

“I’m a half-elf, but—”

“Oh… So you’re only half-smart. I could just go to your sister for this, then.”

I was going to explain to him that that’s not how intelligence works, but I had to get over my own ego because as I reached for my phone— to check what time it was— Mars started yelling threats of broken femurs and bruised pancreases if I even thought about calling Venus. I decided I would check the time on my watch.

I told him, once he stopped his threats, that he should find a similar replacement for Venus’ ring until he found the actual ring, so that when Venus sees him walking around The Villas she wouldn’t immediately notice the missing ring.

“That’s a good idea. I am so smart,” he exclaimed, running out of my room. He stopped in the doorway, “So you’re gonna help me?”

“No.”

“What? Why?” he paused, “Wait, you’re a pussy, right? What if I give you that golden arm-guard that people like you use?”

I scoffed, “It’s a safety precaution, uh… Lame or weak people don’t use it because they’re lame or weak, they—”

“Sounds like something a pussy would say. You want the guard or not?” he interrupted.

Admittedly, I really did want that arm-guard, and through my morning tiredness, I wasn’t in right headspace to consider that he would tie me to this contract, “Yeah, I want it…”  
He gave me a wicked smile and walked out of my room. He didn’t close the door.

I groaned, pushed myself off the floor, and closed the door behind him. I looked over at my comfortable bed, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to get back to sleep before I had to get up again. I tried anyways.

I think I gave up after twenty minutes of faking dreams and staring at my ceiling. I finally pulled myself back out of bed, pulled on some clothes and threw on one of my  
flannels. I was in the bathroom, brushing my teeth when my door flung open again.

“Oh damn… He died.”

“I’m in the bathroom.”

“He lives. But he got another speech impediment.”

I came out of the bathroom with my toothbrush still in my mouth, “Were you ever taught how to knock?”

“Were you ever taught how to spit?” Mars started laughing, and I shoved him out of my room while he was still distracted with his own laughter. (And for the record I could, in fact, spit).

By the time I finished brushing my teeth Mars was already jostling on the doorknob, and pounding on my door to the tune of one of his stepdaughters, Maybelle Savuri’s, songs. I guess she got it stuck in his head, somehow. Or maybe it’s because Maybelle gets her mother, Venus, to occasionally play it in the elevators at The Villas. Today may have been one of those days.

Either way, Mars had gotten over his own joke, and remembered that I had promised to help him find his wedding ring, and I had no excuse of being tired because unfortunately, I was wide awake.

I opened the door, “Ow!”

“That wasn’t my fault,” he said, putting his hand down, “You knew I was knocking.”

“You heard me unlock the door, either way, it doesn’t matter. I was going to say— wait… What do you have on your necklace?”

“A temporary ring replacement,” he held out the chain, and shoved it in my face again, “She won’t even notice at all.”

I blinked, and pushed it out of my face, “You have to change that,” I said, adjusting my glasses, “The One Ring is gold, and very clearly a plastic replica. Venus’ ring is silver and very clearly… Expensive.”

He made a face, that clearly said, 'I am a genius, how dare you assume that my plan won’t work'. I figured he was not going to change it anytime soon.  
I was about to ask him where he last saw his ring, however just as I opened my mouth my neighbour across the hall, Daniel Atkins, opened his door, and stepped out, “I am ready.”

Mars beamed at Daniel, “Awesome.”

I was, admittedly, quite confused… Daniel was helping Mars? I couldn’t help but stare at him.

Daniel was the Head Regulator at The Venus Villas, and a major suck-up to Venus, in other words: he was also my boss, and would tell Venus anything.

“Daniel? What are you doing?”

“Nataniele. I am aiding Mars in his search for the missing wedding ring.”

“I got that, but why?”

“That is not the question you asked, I am—”

Mars slapped me hard on the back between my shoulders, and lead me down the hallway towards the elevators, “That, kid, is for us to know, and is for you to not tell Venus,” Daniel followed behind us, and Mars clicked the down button on the elevator, “But for you, I want you to distract Venus. She’ll be getting ready soon, and we can’t have her walking around the lobby or being wherever she pleases. So that is where you come into play.”

Before I could argue that I did not want to be the one to mess with my boss, the elevator opened, and standing in the middle of the cart was Venus herself, patiently waiting for us to enter into the elevator.

“Mars… I thought you told me that you would be working in your office today.”

We stepped in, “I was. Nate called me about an issue.”

Venus’ eyes moved to me, and I could feel myself starting to sweat. Of course Mars would shift the explanation onto me, what else should I have expected. I was about to make up a quick excuse of loud… Or maybe rowdy coworkers of mine outside my window, but Daniel cleared his throat, and Venus’ gaze settled on him instead.

Daniel was one of her most trusted workers, and she would believe Daniel over most people in The Villas. Which is why he was the Head Regulator, and why my jaw almost hit the floor when he made up a lie to explain why Mars was out of his office. I think he said something about his cousin, Leo, smuggling a Chinese Dragon into The Villas, and was running around with it, but I can’t be sure because I was so shocked that Daniel would lie to Venus that it had slipped my mind to listen to what he said. I remember hearing Leo’s name, Chinese Dragon, and Venus’ yelling about the ‘No Pets Allowed’ rule she put into place after a mermaid flooded the seventh floor in an attempt to keep her swordfish happy. I assumed what the rest of the story was off of those descriptions.

The elevator opened to the lobby, and sure enough Leo wasn’t working his position at front desk, which would seem normal if it weren’t for the circumstances. Venus stepped out of the elevator, and Mars shoved me in the direction that she was marching. I knew that I couldn’t argue about my position now, so I followed begrudgingly. I quickly jogged up to Venus, and straightened my flannel. I was about to ask Venus how her morning was, but out of the corner of my eye I could see Daniel and Mars slip into the kitchen, and I figured I could already assume the answer.

Venus was heading towards the back doors of the building, “I assume this is where you saw him. I hope that I may be able to give him the benefit of the doubt and say that he is not incompetent enough to bring that thing inside.”

Before I could get a chance to answer her question, the little plumes of flame scattered across the grass answered before I could decide whether to say yes or no. I guess Daniel hadn’t lied to her about the issue after all, and I’d be thankful, but I think I’d rather have to make up a lie than having the chance of a forest fire starting. 

Before Venus could get the chance to yell at Leo, someone had already beat her to it, “QU’EST-CE QUE TU PENSE QUE TU FAIS?”

One of The Villas’ chefs, Brenda Antares, had clearly been notified of Leo taking the Chinese Dragon (which I could only assume was her Chinese Dragon which she’s been hiding from Venus for ages), and from all I could assume, she was screaming bloody-murder in French to Leo, whom I couldn’t tell if he was running from the dragon, or if he was running from Brenda herself.

“JE TE LANCERAI EN UN ÉGOUT, LEO JEMBER!”

“Listen, ma’am, I ain’t speakin’ no baguette, so if you would kindly—”

“LEO, I WILL—”

For a moment I don’t think even Venus knew what to do with a screaming French demon chasing down a laughing angel. I could see Venus’ face go through so many mixtures of emotions until she stepped forward and cleared her throat, “Leo Jember and Brenda Antares. What exactly is the meaning of this?”

Leo skidded to a stop half-way across the pavillion, “Don’t worry Venus, we’re just handling a rat invasion—”

Brenda slammed into Leo, and they crashed to the ground, in a pile of groans, and flailing limbs. I think Brenda’s horns got tangled in Leo’s curly hair for a moment. I couldn’t tell if Brenda couldn’t stop in time after Leo’s sudden brake, or if Brenda just wanted to tackle him to the ground. Either way I figured she didn’t mind because she got the final attack before Venus would put this to an end.

“Is that so? Then why is there a Chinese Dragon bounding across my Villas, Leo?”

“Hey, hey, hey. Whoever said I was the one to blame for it?”

“Daniel.”

“That snitch! I ain’t givin’ him none of mama’s cookies at family dinners no more.”

I could see Brenda trying to step off to the sidelines towards her Chinese Dragon, Botien I think she called it, while Venus was distracted with Leo. She grabbed him, and shoved him under the back of her yellow sweater just in time because Venus had noticed her distance from Leo, “Where do you think you’re going, Miss Antares?”

“Uhh… Je ne parle pas l’anglais…?”

“Yes, you do, and either way French is my first language as well,” Brenda looked like she was ready to throw herself in jail, but Venus’ eyes scanned the field, “Where did that thing run off to? I’ll go have Mars find it and deal with it in—”

“NO! I mean… It ran off, just let it be wild again. Leo took it from the wild, let it be free. I mean… It is definitely long gone by now… Somewhere in those woods…” 

Before Venus could protest, Brenda took foot and ran back into the building, “Au revoir!” When she ran past I saw Botien’s head pop out of the back of her sweater. It was a good thing Venus was rubbing her temples in an attempt to rid of what I could only assume was a building headache from dealing with Leo this early in the morning, or else she would have seen him. I watched Brenda pat his head back down under her hood.

If Venus wanted to follow Brenda, she didn’t. Instead she walked over to Leo and grabbed him by the ear, “You will clean up this mess. Once you have finished putting out the fires you will come talk with me,” she let go of his ear and returned to the back doors of The Villas, where I hadn’t moved from.

The formerly green grass had been scorched black in areas, and there were still small patches that were still aflame. I watched Leo try to put one out by spitting on it (he didn’t succeed). I was honestly surprised that Leo hadn’t set one of the other buildings in The Villas on fire, because comparing the damage to how The Villas greenery looked before, it seemed as if he had grabbed Botien and squeezed him until he started setting things on fire.

I figured that this was another part of Mars’ plan to distract Venus, and I could believe that coming from Mars, but it still baffled me that Daniel would go along with his plan so smoothly.

Venus must have seen the confusion on my face because she said, “Unfortunately, I am used to this. Do not fret for me, Nate.”

I had just nodded, not knowing how to explain that I wasn’t confused with what Leo was doing, but with the simple acceptance of his cousin… And maybe even, from Mars’ point of view, how smoothly this was going when Mars was the one who planned this. Venus and I walked back into the hotel after we watched Leo try to slap the fires out with his bare hand.

I watched Venus walk into the infirmary, and I assumed she was grabbing Advil for her headache. I quickly walked into the kitchen while Venus was busy, and most honestly I regretted my curiosity.

Clearly Venus wasn’t the only one having a bad morning, because Brenda stood in in front of the food bar, looking as if she was about to blow up. Between Leo stealing Botien and almost getting him killed, there was a new issue that Brenda had to deal with because now Daniel sat in front of the food she prepared for today with a waffle in his hands and what I could only assume was some sort of chocolate in his mouth. Daniel had managed to eat half of the food for the entire Villa before Brenda came in and started yelling and waving her arms around angrily.

Daniel was half-demon, half-witch, and had also died in the 1940’s, so when I say he stomached half of The Villas meal for the day, I mean it. He could eat everything from a restaurant, and still continue to eat if he really wanted to. And Daniel really likes food, so I could guarantee that he would continue.

Botien perched on Brenda’s shoulder, and I could have sworn he gave a disapproving shake to Daniel. I would have placed bets on the assumption that little fourteen-year-old Brenda was about to strangle Daniel (although it wouldn’t have done anything, Daniel was a ghost), but Mars walked out of the kitchen, “I think we should— oh no, Brenda’s back.”

“YOU! I should have known this was your doing! Was Leo your doing as well?” Mars gave a smug nod, “Of course, You’re impossible! Hey, Daniel, stop eating that!”

Daniel looked like a kicked puppy when she slapped the rest of the waffle out of his hand. Daniel had maple syrup in his dark curly hair, and the shine he had in his eyes while devouring the food was now gone, “That was impolite.”

Brenda ignored him, “Mars, what do you think you’re doing? Messing up everything today for your own enjoyment?”

“Well, yes, but no. I lost Venus’ ring, and I figured if I retraced my steps while distracting Venus I could find it without any trouble. So… I got Leo to take your dragon so it would get you out of the kitchen and we could look through the food.”

She gritted her teeth, “Why would you have to look through the food, Mars?”

“‘Cause last night I came in here and…” Mars realized that he had backed himself into a corner, “Helped… Myself.”

I could have sworn that if there wasn’t a barrier between her and Mars, Brenda would have launched herself at him. Daniel sat behind the food bar, watching in silence, and quietly picked away at some fruit. I think he was eating strawberries.

Brenda looked as if she’d burst into flames any second, but she took a deep breath, slapped the strawberry from Daniel’s hand, and she looked back over at Mars, “Mars,” she walked around the food bar, and she stuck out her hand.

Mars stared at her hand for a moment, “This is some sort of trick, ain’t it? I will deny your offer.” He gave a wicked smile as if he just defeated the final boss on the first try. Brenda, clearly, did not see it this way. She kicked him in the shin and Botien blew a puff of smoke in Mars’ face.

“You are impossible, Mars. Get out of my kitchen or I will tell Venus that you, not only lost her ring, but you also are the cause of all this chaos. I don’t think she will be particularly pleased with you.”

It was clear the Mars didn’t want to take any chances. He rubbed his shin and nodded, “Yes ma’am!”

“And take Daniel with you!” Daniel looked shocked, and Mars grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, and propped him up on his feet. Mars walked towards the door, and I saw Daniel grab one more waffle, before following behind Mars. I figured the only reason he was listening to what Mars wanted him to do was really because he knew that if he didn’t follow, Brenda would have slapped that waffle from his hands again.

Mars stopped in the doorway, “Are we still gonna spar tonight?” Mars ducked as a bowl flew over his head, “Okay, see you then!” Mars and Daniel quickly exited the kitchen.

Brenda pointed a finger at me, “Are you a part of this too?”

“I was told to keep an eye on Venus,” As I said this I realized that I had been separated from Venus for a much longer period of time than she needed to grab Advil, “Which I would need to get back to… Probably right now…”

Brenda threw her hands up, “C’est un cauchemar! Allez!” She shooed me out of the kitchen.

I felt bad for Brenda. I knew that Mars threw her in the middle of his problems without a warning, at least he had asked me if I wanted to help (even though I figure that he would have made me help him even if I denied). I knew that either way Brenda wouldn’t have told Venus of what Mars was doing. She was Mars’ lieutenant, and I would assume that she wouldn’t want to mess that up.

I looked around the lobby for Mars or Daniel, but I didn’t see a sign of either of them. I assumed that Mars locked himself in his office because I saw a ‘DO NOT ENTER. Work in Progress’ sign taped to his door. I guessed Mars was actually just hiding in there because he would never actually have ‘work in progress’.

I was about to knock on Mars’ door, but I saw Venus emerge from Mercury’s workshop. She was holding a tiny box, and she looked around for someone, before her eyes landed on me, then my hand that was still raised to knock. She narrowed her eyes, and walked over, “Did Mars not tell you that he didn’t want to be disturbed today?” I assumed she was referencing the sign taped to his door.

I could see my arm starting to shake, so I lowered it back to my side, “I was… Uhh… Going to report some information he asked for to him.”

She tilted her head up, “Is that so? And what, exactly, would this information be?”

“It’s a… Surprise. For you, he’s been planning this for a while and he’s putting it together for you today.” I couldn’t tell if she was surprised, or if she just didn’t believe me. I hoped that she believed me, and was just shocked by Mars’ gesture.

“What would this surprise be?”

“Venus, do you know what a surprise means? You’ll have to wait and find out.”

She puffed out her chest, but nodded, “Either way, I must talk to him. If you would excuse me for a moment,” she reached for the doorknob, “You may deliver your… Information afterwords.”

I was about to tell her that she couldn’t go in there, but luckily Leo walked back into the lobby, “Ayo, Venus!” He looked around for her, “Ah, found ya’. I finished with the fires. Your lawn is lookin’ like a billionaires.”

I heard Venus sigh, but it distracted her enough, and she turned to Leo, “That is excellent. We will talk in a few minutes. Please stay in the lobby.”  
“No-can-do, man. I gotta tell Mars that his plan ain’t workin’.”

Venus narrowed her eyes, and I could see her putting the pieces together. Part of me didn’t want to believe that Leo just threw all of us under the bus, but I honestly wasn’t even that shocked that he would say something so unintelligent.

Before Venus could respond, Leo seemed to realize that he just blew his cover, “I’m meanin’ his plan ‘bout… Keepin’ the grass fertilized. It’s all burnt now. His plan ain't workin’.” Venus clearly wasn’t believing his explanation.

“You two,” she pointed at Leo, then me, “Will wait for me to return in Mars’ office. Nate, you will keep both Leo and Mars in there.” She gave me a stern look, and I nodded.

Leo looked as if he were about to protest that he could keep himself in control, but he just nodded, “That’s fair.”

I could feel my stomach sinking lower and lower into my abdomen the more I understood how much trouble Leo just got us all into. I opened Mars’ door, and I shoved Leo in before quickly closing the door behind us.

Mars was laying on his couch, and he looked up at us over his GameBoy.

“Leo told Venus that there was a plan. We’re in trouble.”

“Hey, to be fair, I ain’t tell her why there was a plan, and I came up with a good excuse.” I rolled my eyes.

Mars sat up, cursing (whether he was cursing at Leo, or just in general, I couldn’t tell). I stopped Mars before he stood up, “Venus told us to stay in your office, and it’s gonna be a lot worse if you leave.”

Mars scoffed, as if to say, ‘Oh yeah, what’s she gonna do about it?’ but he considered the consequences and fell back into his seat again. 

Leo sat in Mars’ desk chair and span in circles, “I think what we need to do is fake our own—”

“Leo!”

“I’m just sayin’ that there seems to be no other way, Mr. Genius. Unless you got anotha’ plan?” he gave me a look as if to tell me I belonged in a circus.

“We could just wait for Venus to come back. We would get into less trouble, and we’ve already been caught. There is no escaping at this point, the most we can do is try to do as she pleases so she won’t get more upset.” I thought it made sense. Leo, apparently, did not.

Leo started talking about a plan to disguise Mars’ office as the Dining Hall, but at that point I started tuning him out. I sat down in a spare armchair that Mars had in his office, and I waited for Venus to return.

After a few minutes of Leo walking around the office and gesturing to different things, Venus came back in with Brenda and Daniel. I think that Daniel was trying to act as if he was here in support of Venus, but it was clear by her expression that she knew what he’d done. Daniel stood at her side with a set posture, and I couldn’t tell if Brenda was glaring more daggers at Mars or at Leo.

“Find a seat, you three.”

Leo noticed Venus at this point, and shook his head, “We was too slow, fellas,” he took his seat back in Mars’ armchair. Brenda sat beside Mars on his couch, which left Daniel and Venus still standing.

Venus pointed towards me, “Nate, scootch over, you and Daniel will share the chair.”

My ears started ringing, and I nodded, moving over to the left as much as I could. Having two of my bosses in the same room made me nervous, and having Daniel sit that close to me made me a little uncomfortable to say the least. I tried to ignore how close Daniel was to me while Venus talked.

In all honesty, although I tried not to, I still got distracted by Daniel. I kept having to jar myself into listening to Venus again. When I zoned back in, Daniel was talking, “Venus, if I may intervene, I know that not only had Mars planned this entire scheme, but he had also bribed the people included. Except Brenda, Brenda was not aware of this, she was just a victim.” Mars looked as if he were about to strangle Daniel.

“Mars, why did you do all this?”

“I’m just saying that what was done needed to be done.”

“If I may intervene, again,” Venus held up a hand to Mars when he tried to interrupt Daniel, “To my knowledge, Mars had recruited help from the workers here to aid him in finding the wedding ring that he lost. Your wedding ring, to be specific.”

Mars collapsed in on himself, and pretended to be dead. Venus grabbed the chain from around his neck and examined it, “You put on a replacement. This does not resemble mine in the slightest,” she shook her head at him, and pulled the box she had earlier out of her purse, “You did not lose your ring. I saw last night that you had cracked it, so I took it to Mercury so he could fix it.” She scowled at him.

Mars peeked his eye open, “Oh, damn… Really?”

“Yes, Mars.”

Mars sat up again, and nodded a little, “False alarm, guys, I found my ring,” he took the ring from Venus, and switched out the One Ring for his actual ring. He reached over to one of his desk drawers and threw the replica in it.

Venus gritted her teeth, and shook her head in disappointment. I could only imagine that she was wondering why she married such an idiot. That’s what I would be thinking if I were her.

Venus started creating punishments for each person who contributed to Mars’ search. Mars would spend the next two days in The Villas prison, and after that he was to help the janitors clean The Villas, and he would be sleeping in his own room for the next three weeks. I figured that the last part was the worst punishment for him, because when she said that was when he started to argue. He lost the argument. Venus told Leo that he was to help the gardeners fix the lawn outside, and if he was late to work again he would also be jailed. (They came to a compromise that said if he were late to work in the next three weeks he would be sent to jail). Daniel was to help Brenda in the kitchen until, not only was all the food remade, but until Brenda was satisfied. He was also not allowed to eat anything, or else Brenda was to report it to Venus and he would get a ‘much worse’ punishment, in her words.

Venus then turned to me and I felt my blood turn cold. I didn’t know what she was going to do to me, because I had no idea what anyone said that I did. I realized that anyone could have thrown me under the bus for something I didn’t do because I was so focused on Daniel. I hoped that Brenda or maybe even Daniel himself would have defended me if Mars tried to make something up.

“Nate, I want you to write down everything that happened. Be as detailed as you can, but do not make it too long. I do not want to read a twenty-page long paper about this morning,” she smiled slightly at me, “I expect you to be done by tomorrow. You may write it however you please.”

It was clear that whoever let her know what I did told the truth, because Venus gave me a task that honestly seemed fun.

So… I guess that leads to where I am now. I’m in my room, just finishing up this story. Maybe I made this too… Informal, but to be fair, Venus, you did tell me I could write this however I pleased, and you know that I want to be a journalist when I’m older, so I’m taking my creative liberties.

This is probably too close to the twenty-page-limit that you gave me, my apologies for that, Venus, but I did try to explain everything that happened to how I remembered it. I also want to mention, before I have to end this, that Mars did not, in fact, give me the golden arm-guard. I am quite disappointed in that. However, since I am running out of space, I will end my retelling here. I hope this is satisfactory, Venus.

Signed,

Nate Sagittarius

**Author's Note:**

> That was hella epic if you actually just read all of that. I know you may not know what Nate Sagittarius is, but I'd definately go check out Gianna's account (again: @lamehaikus on Instagram) because getting to know her characters is hella cool! I know I haven't posted on here in almost three years, but I figured I should start tracking what I write again, so I'm going to post this here (although knowing me, I will forgot about AO3 again).


End file.
